32.

It was a roller coaster with cold feet. The inevitability of a happy ever after didn't even phase me.

It never does, the chick flick fanatic.

Along for the Ride by Sarah Dessen is totally note-worthy. With the hints of feminism and looking beneath the surface and change and second chances. Can't even describe.

Parallelism FTW, Valerie.

32.

I was sitting on the bus on the way home alone, just listening to the static bus radio and watching people disperse from school. I saw the girl hugging the stomach of her boyfriend and laughing giddily, i saw the effortlessly cool and chic girl, walking powerfully away with her band mates, wind in her hair, that wasn't manufactured. I saw the badass throw behind him a can as him and his friends slouched to the oh-so-popular hang out. And then there was me, the kid riding the bus home with intense cramps and no idea what she was doing. It then hit me that i wasn't part of a stereotype. I suppose that's what i always wanted. I wanted to be different, to be the girl who gets along with everyone and - i do. Every person i saw walking out of that school i have been friends with, every one of them share memories in my heart. But there was an odd stereotypical longing to belong in a tight wound group that shared something more than classes and common interests. I wanted a quirk that made me a stereotype, so i was definable. But i'm not definable except for the ever classic :insane or "nice". and I'm not a stereotype. In a stereotypical world, like on a yellow school bus watching, that mentality takes over. Like a veil in an old sitcom. 

Thoughts, V. 

30.

Dissociation.

            No I don’t mean like isolating yourself from society. When an ionic compound is placed in water, aqueous solution the ions dissociate so that an electric charge of sorts can easily pass through the mobile ions. It’s the same as a bunch of new people in a new room, separated from themselves, almost. Can be who they want to be. Compulsive liar’s bliss. An electric charge can change everything, move everyone back into their place. Reveal truth. Court cases are like that. 12 jurors, no connection but the charge of justice, hope, truth. Justice for the defense, hope that there is justice and truth in this world, that’s the charge. It’s hot and stingy and fuels people like nothing else.

            Like a common cause during a storm. When survival kicks in. When it matters.

            Electricity. 

28.

Spring break is a wonderful time, friends.

Here comes the sun :)

I'm extremely excited for my spring break this year, its already been fun-filled with coolness from cola's parties and gi adventure "late lunch" picnics and such. I just can't wait until everything finally falls into place. I'm not even THAT mad about the 3 essays, research project, reading 100 pages, multiple choice questions that i have to do for English. I mean that's not even getting my panties into a bunch. I can't wait to visit the new Panera Bread that just opened around me, thats awesome. And last year me and viv's coolness in track practice was rediculous. 

This year Ben can drive. 

Sorry it's been a little scatter-brained, but my mind is on spring overload. Parents are cookin a bbq.

Sweet Summer Breezes full of BBQ smells, V. 

Ps. I gotta get new times for some guitar lessons. I miss that.

27.

Two posts today woah, this must be a new record. 

Listen:

To the sound of the heart beat

constant.

To the sound of breathing

concurrent with emotion.

To your eye's pleas 

for these times take tolls

on minds

buying for time

to live life.

Live life,

Love life

Breath Life.

Beat Life.

See Life. 

Be Life. 

Time's to short for doubt. 

26.

wow. sorry for the lack of posts. i've been mega busy and around. no time for blogging, or so it seems. 

Today, this morning. it was early and i was sitting in my dad's black pickup truck, cruising. So it's nice and sunny, I'm feeling good. Then i glance out the window and i see a woman in front of a grave in a graveyard that never has any people in front of it. It was like a slap in the face, it's all i keep thinking about. Life is too short. She was holding her head down, with a bouquet. It was an old grave, the word had been faded out. At least someone remembered them. That's how long we're all alive isn't it? It's how long we're remembered. That's how Freddy Cruger stayed alive. Fear. But we all want to stay alive from Love. All you need is Love. 

Sorry I'm melancholy at the moment. Reflection can take on that tone sometimes. I picked the photo to juxtapose. Everyone loves some juxtaposition. Besides, it shows you I'm not a depressed little girl, but a complex rather optimistic cool cat. 

Other news in the world of Valerie? 

Well: I was in the school play (The Wizard of Oz) I was a munchkin and an ozian, it was rocking. We sold out all three shows but i didn't get to celebrate Friday the 13 as I ought to. I really want to have a seance but my friends are all non-believers. Shun the non believers :)

I joined Track. Cool right? I'm probably going to throw some discus and javelin and maybe do some minor running. I want to learn how to do a jumping event. But my main reason for joining is to have that summer body, and for once feel comfortable in a bikini. So it may be a shallow reason for joining a sports team, but what ever sue me!

Erm.... other new things? Can't really think of any. 

Keep ya posted. Maybe i'll even have a post everyday. 

Follow your heart, V. 

25.

It's finally spring. the showers, the sun, the chirping birds. its all here- so in essence it's spring. I justify my action of sitting outside and doing my homework because of the spring time weather.

The cold concrete beneath my feet, the cool breeze, nature noises. IT'S SPRING. the fact that it's spring makes me nauseatingly excited. I just got back from an excursion to peekskill, more specifically to the coffee house where we made a vocabulary test for my insane teacher Barthelmes. It was awesome. Then we ventured into a thrift shop, a treat shop and a "east village NYC" shop. Anything East Village is my vice; that is where i want to live from 18 till death. Maybe with some London living in the mix. We looked around and it was amazing. Lazy sundays are always amazing. Now i have to start my massive amount of HW. 

Currently listening to: Barrel of a Gun by Guster. Did you know the song is about masturbation? 

130 days until Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince movie comes out. Damn Twilight, or i would've already seen it. :/ 

I hope it doesn't rain or my laptop is toast.

Homeworking, V.